Why is it that we find it extremely hard to accept, praise, and even love our friends, family members, and partners while we don’t leave a stone unturned when it comes to criticizing the same people?
Maybe this is because of the way we are brought up and the way society shapes us.
It could also be because it is just natural to blame others and find faults. Isn’t it?
However, it is about time we realize that in favoring conflict and antagonism over empathy and love, we are only adversely affecting ourselves and the ones closest to us.
I find it bewildering when during therapy sessions, clients talk to me about the positive feelings they had experienced with their partners but when I ask them if they shared this with their significant other, they say no. Upon further inquiry, when I ask them why didn’t they talk to their partners and make them feel good by sharing this information, what I often get is a surprised look.
Yes, it might seem that all one needs to is spread the positivity, but it’s not at all as easy as it seems.
The Endless Cycle Of Negativity
When the spark in a relationship tends to fade away, the energy considerably declines, and negativity starts to creep in. The same thing happens in a relationship that starts becoming violent. Severe criticism, abuse, and cold body language begin to create stark differences.
Things might seem difficult, and there’s no denying the fact that they are challenging. However, relationships can be turned around – even right from the lowest point. This can be done by making the most of the pivotal moments such as sharing some positive experience, helping your counterpart feel better in difficult circumstances, and showing that you care.
Stop overthinking and start working on your relationship.
You’ll later be thanking yourself that you did.
Why praising and encouraging others is so difficult?
What happens is that most of the time, people are keeping score of how many times a specific person helped them or made them feel better and how many times did they insult them or caused them pain. This substantially lowers the chances of developing a loving and compassionate relationship because the focus isn’t where it is supposed to be.
It’s essential you realize that if you aim to win, then you’ll eventually lose.
Become more forgiving and spread kindness. Communicate. Say what you feel and why you feel it. Increase positivity in your relationships to strengthen them.
Do your best, and things will eventually work out.
Remember that you have all the power you need to change the course of any relationship of yours for the better. The choice is yours and we are here to support you.